Forever Mine Read online

  Tears streaked those gray anger-hardened eyes. “I never—”

  “Sumner,” a female voice echoed from behind them.

  Leonard jerked toward Lady Sumner who solemnly stood cloaked in a black velvet cape that hid her traveling gown.

  Augustine silently stood beside her.

  Lady Sumner set her chin and stared the earl down. “I will oversee what is left of her name. Better this than having her disappear into the night on her own, never to be seen again.”

  The earl whirled to face her. “Have you lost the last of your mind, Anne? Do you not realize what people will say? They will accuse our daughter of the worst.”

  Lady Sumner’s features remained cool and emotionless. “I want her out of this house and out of your care lest something happens. I will say no more.”

  Lowering his gaze, the earl swiped a trembling hand across his face. “Go. All of you. Go! May I never lay eyes on any of you again!”

  Silence enveloped the entrance hall as Augustine led her mother back outside and into the night.

  The earl continued to stare toward the open doors where they had disappeared. He eventually turned his gaze to Leonard and rasped, “I will ask a final time that you not perpetuate this. I have already paid for my sins. God will be the judge of them, not you.”

  Pointing a rigid finger, Leonard countered, “Do not fear God, my lord. Fear me.”

  With that, Leonard swung away and stalked out into the night toward the carriage where Augustine and her mother lingered. He couldn’t save Catherine from the clutches of illness, suffering and death, but he could damn well protect Augustine with his last breath. And he would. He bloody would.

  What a mess.

  Stripping his robe from his torso and tossing it, Leonard yanked back the linens and was about to flop himself into bed in exasperation when a knock sounded against the paneled door of his bedchamber. He paused and glanced back, his mind still somewhat dazed and clouded. “Yes?”

  “Are you awake?” Augustine called out from the other side.

  His brows rose. “Is everything all right?”

  She was quiet for a moment. “Can I sleep with you tonight? Please?”

  He froze and then swiveled toward the door. Striding to it, he swung it open, his pulse thundering. Without meeting her gaze, he blurted, “For God’s sake, your mother is barely a few doors down. What are you trying to do? Burn the last of my name in her eyes whilst making me suffer? I suggest you retire.”

  She lingered in the doorway, garbed in a simple, white nightdress, and stared up at him with those beautifully haunting gray eyes. Lopsided strands of silky, midnight hair framed her flushed face as longer curls fell seductively down past her long pale neck and over her covered breasts. “I’m sorry,” she quietly confided, smoothing her hands against the sides of her nightdress. “I kept staring at the panels thinking someone would emerge from them. I went to talk to my mother, but she has a habit of locking her door at night and is already asleep.” Her voice trailed off. “I should go. Shouldn’t I?”

  His throat tightened. He blew out a breath and stepped aside. “There is no need for you to sleep alone if you’re not feeling safe. Come. My room is your room.”

  “Thank you.” She walked past him, those hips gently swaying and shifting beneath her nightdress which clung to her smooth movements. The achingly sweet smell of crisp lavender which he’d been waiting to bury himself into wafted toward him as she passed.

  He closed the door, praying for inner strength and hoped to God he didn’t muff this up by just grabbing for her. “I was just about to get into bed.” As if that wasn’t obvious.

  She quickly rounded the bed and hopped up onto it, burying herself within the linen. “Good. So was I.” Nestling herself against the pillow, she turned toward him, her long black hair splayed across not only her pillow, but his. She met his gaze and smiled.

  The adoration and blooming, unexpected trust beaming within that face caught his breath and made him realize just how much he missed being loved. “Make yourself at home.”

  Her eyes brightened in a way he’d never had the pleasure of seeing. “Oh, I will. I also intend to take all the linen and leave you with none.”

  A laugh escaped him. “I have been duly warned.”

  Yanking on the sleeves on his nightclothes, he made his way toward the bed and nervously noted the way she continued to watch him. Those inquisitive eyes skimmed his dressed down frame in a manner that pricked his skin with raw awareness. He hadn’t had a woman see him in a state of undress since…Catherine. He shoved away the thought.

  Settling onto the mattress, he drew the linens up to his chest. How was he going to survive this night? By ignoring her, is how. He grudgingly turned away. “May we celebrate better, happier days than the one we had tonight.”

  “Amen.”

  “Sleep well.”

  “Yes. You, too.”

  Just as he was about to lean over the side of the bed and blow out the candle on the nightstand, a small hand came patting its way across the mattress and up his shoulder. She tapped him. “Leonard?”

  He paused and glanced back over his shoulder. “Yes?”

  “Thank you. For…everything.” She hesitated and added, “You have touched my life so beautifully and unexpectedly, I have yet to comprehend how blessed I am. I didn’t know men like you could exist.”

  So much for trying to ignore her. He rolled back toward her and slid himself closer. “It is I who am blessed.” He reached out, his hand wrapping around the warmth of her firm waist and dragged her over toward him. He hovered above her, wishing she would let him kiss her.

  She stared up at him with those large gray eyes, her cheeks flushed, her hair as wild and free as his heart wanted to be. “You can kiss me now. The way you wanted to in the garden.”

  He drew in a breath, his heart pounding. “You don’t need to feel obligated to let me kiss you.”

  “I don’t feel obligated,” she insisted. “I want you to.”

  He lowered his gaze to her full lips and hissed out a breath. He had almost forgotten what it was like to kiss a woman. “We shouldn’t. Not in the state I’m in. The port is still going strong.”

  She searched his face. “I trust you. I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t. Whatever happens, happens.”

  He felt his own face flushing. “Augustine—”

  Her hand popped up and hooked itself around his neck, yanking him toward her. “We have already broken every rule there is. I doubt anything we do will make it worse.”

  Everything about her was innocence wrapped in odd maturity that enchanted him and his soul. To think that she was finally his was beyond riling. What the devil was he waiting for? To hell with propriety. Matrimony may never again be his, but Augustine was his. His to protect, his to love and his to…kiss. And God did he ever want to kiss her.

  He lowered his gaze to her lips again and sunk his body onto hers, angling his mouth to fit hers. Gently forcing those lips apart, he slid his tongue into the moist warmth of her mouth and slowly deepened his kiss. Her tongue, though at first it hesitated, responded and gave in to him, making him bite back an anguished groan.

  She was everything he thought she would be and more.

  Her hands slid up his shoulders, past his throat and pushed their way into his hair. He melted against that probing touch and dragged her fully beneath his body, trying not to crush her, but unwilling to let her go. He kissed her harder and dug his fingers into her silken strands, grinding his rigid erection into her thigh, desperately wanting and needing her.

  Losing himself to that tongue and to that warmth, his mind blanked and he knew this was far, far more than mere need and lust. This was love. Damn it all, it was love, sweet love.

  He deepened their kiss, his chest heaving from the realization that despite his love for her, she might never feel the same. If ever. It was a wretched realization he didn’t want to admit. But he would prove himself to her in time. He would. He would ensur
e she gasped on the hour knowing it.

  Dragging her nightdress slowly up to her waist, he slid his hand between her smooth, soft thighs, parting her legs. He broke their kiss and held her gaze, gently rubbing her nub. “I will cease touching you the moment you tell me to.”

  She nodded. Though her eyes questioningly searched his, she silently angled herself and her hips toward him, entrusting herself to him completely.

  It was mesmerizing to know that she was placing her life, her pleasure and her happiness in his hands. Tightening his jaw, he ground his hard length against her. He pleasured and pleasured her with his finger until they were both having trouble breathing.

  An astonished moan escaped her parted lips as she rocked against his hand.

  He kissed her soft lips, encouraging her to give into it more. He kissed her lips again and again while she savagely pressed against his hand, moaning in the silence of the room. Her fingers skimmed his back, making him flick and rub her faster.

  She trembled and gasped beneath him.

  She was unraveling as fast as he was.

  He must have lost the last of his mind to be taking advantage of her like this. He tugged at the scooped neck of her nightdress with the hand that wasn’t fingering her and bared her breasts so he could see them. She was stunning. He licked the nipple closest to him and slid his tongue down, curving the wet tip of his tongue along the soft, rounded slope of her full breast. “I have been wanting you like this ever since we first danced.” He flicked her harder.

  She arched her breasts toward him, her lips parting as her eyes closed. A long moan escaped her as she extended her throat against the climax he knew was overtaking her. She trembled against him, gasping, and eventually stilled, her eyes popping back open as if she was only now realizing he was touching her.

  Her breasts were still on display, those hardened nipples taunting him into seizing her. He wanted to thrust deep into her and only managed to refrain by reminding himself that she was not only a virgin but had yet to be made his wife.

  He jerked up his nightshirt, savagely draping her against his side and used his hand to eliminate the throbbing in his rigid length. His knuckles grazed her skin with each jerking movement of his hand over his cock.

  She watched him, her cheeks ablaze, the astonishment visible.

  He should have stopped, given her shock and innocence, but his mind had long been drowned by alcohol, lust, want, need and…love. He was no longer alone in the silence of his room pleasuring himself at the thought of her. She was here with him and she was his.

  “Augustine,” he whispered, jerking himself faster until pleasure ripped through him. His climax came so fast and overtook him with such riled and unexpected strength, he let out a long groan in disbelief. He moaned, throwing his head back, and gave in to every incredible moment of pleasure.

  When the haze of bliss had ebbed, he withdrew his hand, blowing out a ragged breath. He shifted his lower body away from her thigh. “God help me, I tried to resist. I tried.”

  Her lips were still parted and moist from his mouth as her eyes followed his. A shaky breath escaped her as she dragged him back into her arms. “That was bliss beyond reason.”

  He nuzzled his nose against the softness of her hair, the scent of lavender making him close his eyes. “I prefer to call it love,” he murmured against the tresses of her hair, reopening his eyes.

  She shyly dragged her nightdress up, covering her breasts, and smiled, shifting toward him. “You love me?”

  “Yes, Auggie. I will admit that I do.”

  Her smile faded. She searched his face. “Don’t call me that.”

  “What? Auggie?” He dabbed her nose with a finger and smirked. “Why not? It suits you.”

  She caught his hand and drew it away, her features tightening. “Only my brother ever called me Auggie. So don’t…don’t call me that.”

  He paused, his teasing smirk faded. “I’m sorry.” Gently, he gathered her into his arms and rolled her onto his chest, settling them both back upon the mattress. Cradling her head against the curve of his arm, he drew in a long breath and let it out. She would forever be haunted by her brother’s disappearance. Much like he would forever be haunted by Catherine’s death. What a sad, heartbroken pair they made.

  “Augustine,” he whispered, brushing away strands of hair from the sides of her smooth cheeks. “Once I ensure everything is in place for us to leave, we will commence a full investigation into your brother’s disappearance that will involve every last soul both here and in New York. We will find him.”

  She lowered her gaze, tracing her finger against the lacings of his nightshirt. Lifting a tear-streaked gaze, she nodded.

  He lowered his chin and kissed her forehead. “Sleep.”

  She rubbed her cheek against him and glanced up at him. “How were you able to move on after your wife’s death? Especially given that you loved her so much? I want to know. In case I…need to move on myself.”

  He closed his eyes and confessed against the last of his swaying mind, “There is no moving on, Augustine. There is simply acceptance of what cannot be changed. And by accepting what cannot be changed, you allow for more beautiful things to come. Such as this. Such as us.”

  Chapter Four

  When will I know peace? When I find him.

  -From the diary of Lady Augustine Jane Ascott

  Leonard squinted against the misty, gray morning light seeping through the large latticed windows of his bedchamber and winced against the headache pinching his skull. The curtains on both the bed and the windows had already been thrown back by the chambermaid. Odd. Did he request to be roused earlier than usual?

  He shifted beneath the warm linens and reached out to fetch another pillow to pile beneath his head and froze as his fingers slid into something soft. Definitely not a pillow. He paused, his gaze falling on a wealth of black, lustrous hair that covered his pillow.

  His heart almost ceased beating.

  He shook the hair out of his fingers and stumbled out of bed, his bare feet slapping the hard wood floor. Who the hell was in his bed? He quickly rounded the four-poster.

  Between the opened curtains of the bed, he made out smooth bundled curves that rose up from beneath the moss-colored quilts and white linen. The delicate, round face of a young woman appeared beneath the wildly splayed dark hair.

  Leonard’s eyes widened. It was…Augustine.

  Thin, arched jet brows, high cheekbones and full pretty lips confirmed that it really was her. She continued to sleep peacefully with one hand tucked beneath the side of her face as if she had always slept on the right side of his bed.

  He drew closer, everything coming back to him. Too much port. A rash decision. And bliss beyond measure.

  He tilted his head to one side, a soothing warmth pooling in his chest as he continued to admire the way all that long wild black hair splayed across her shoulders and the pillow. Whether he had been in his right mind or not, Augustine was one of the best decisions he had made in a very long time…or ever. He hated knowing that he had wasted most of the Season watching her wistfully from a distance as opposed to drawing her into his life where she belonged. And to think she had been quietly suffering all along. But no more.

  He seated himself on the edge of the bed beside her and leaned in toward her, listening to her soft intake of breath. That scent of lavender drifted from her skin, making him lean in closer. May he relive this glorious moment for the rest of his days, knowing she would always be in his arms and in his bed.

  A long, soft sigh escaped her lips as she shifted.

  He didn’t move. He simply waited for those beautiful eyes to open so that he could confirm that this was in fact real.

  With her eyes still closed, she withdrew an arm from beneath the linens and brought a hand to her forehead, raking back tresses from her face. She paused. Her lids popped open, those large gray eyes instantly appearing.

  Heat thundered through his body as their gazes met and held.
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  She gawked up at him. “Oh, dear.”

  He grinned, unable to break that astonished gaze and leaned back, shifting away. “You should probably run along before your mother finds us.”

  She jerked up into a sitting position, her small nose wrinkling. Shifting toward him, her eyes darted around the room. “This is going to create quite the scandal.”

  He took in a deep breath and blew it out, trying to think of the best way to address this situation. “If you marry me, it won’t be quite the scandal.”

  She groaned and plummeted sideways, her face and arms thudding against the mattress hard. “Apparently, I find you irresistible. Who knew?”

  He smirked. It wasn’t a proclamation of love, but it was good enough. He smoothed a hand across that rounded backside which was jutting up toward him through her nightdress. “I suggest you get back to your room before your mother finds us.”

  She lifted her head and glanced toward him. “When do we leave for New York?”

  “In about five days or so. That will allow enough time for me to settle all matters pertaining to our travels and the estate. I was supposed to have gone up to Scotland as well, so I have to take care of that business, too.”

  She met his gaze, her eyes soft but serious, as they always seemed to be. “I have made a mess of your life.”

  “No, you haven’t,” he drawled. “My life was already a mess. At least now it’s a pretty one.”

  A smile touched her lips as she smoothed her nightdress against her arms, brightening her features.

  “There,” he added. “A smile. Now the mess is entirely gone.”

  Her smile spread into a stunning grin that made his breath hitch. “You are truly something, Leonard. Truly something.”

  Touching her hand to his, she scrambled up and hopped out of bed with a resounding thud. Her nightdress trailed behind her as she headed toward the window. Her long black hair swayed against her movements, covering the curves of her waist as she placed a hand on the ledge of the window and peered out. She stood up on her bare toes and pressed her nose against the latticed windowpane. Her breath fogged the glass. “’Tis so beautiful.”